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how to miss your dad

As you cook dinnerGlance at the phone. A moment later, you will think:It’s that hour. The best time to call him It’s ok. Just say to yourself I miss my dad. In the weeks after he’s gone, driving, you noticeyou’re not in the moodfor a podcastTell Siri to play Dad’s FavouritesA playlist you put togetherAfter…
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place of attention

On my way to the office last Friday, I raced up Howth Hill in my Mini, taking the scenic route from the pier to the Summit. The fresh, autumnal air and the bright morning sun promised a clear view on the other side of the peninsular—a panoramic stretch across Dublin Bay to the Sugarloaf Mountain.…
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being, becoming, belonging

In June, I posted the following question on social media: Do you think you should be doing something more important or meaningful or just BIGGER with your life? One hundred and sixty-two people took a moment to answer it. Eighty-one people, exactly half of everyone who responded, spent another few minutes explaining their answers. Many…
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disturbance

For the past few months, I go to the pool every day. Swimming is the priority. By the time I drive along the coast to get there, and then back again, half an hour in the water takes two hours from my day. In February I woke up with a sore leg. Which lingered. A…
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friendiversary

In two hours, I will collect my pal Tamara from Dublin airport. She’s flying in from the UK to spend the weekend with me. I wonder if she can remember the day when we first became friends. I cannot. I do, however, recall telling another friend from work, when that person came to lunch at…
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emptiness

Lately, I notice an occasional emptiness. A whispering worry that something is missing. Or that I’m forgetting something, losing hold of a vague yet vital piece of life. My mind labels this “that empty feeling” – it arrives like a wind that ruffles the leaves and then slips away. It comes and it goes. I…
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the wisdom of stuckness

A close friend struggles with whether to close the business he has run for many years. Someone else feels a great urge to leave her marriage while hoping never to do so. At the height of the COVID lockdowns, I attended a webinar led by a man who dispenses advice about organizational change. At one point…
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congruence

Do you feel you’re living your right life, or does something seem off? This question nagged me for much of my adult life. In my book, Counting Zeros, I write about vocational angst – how it sometimes drove me mad. The easiest way for me to explain what I mean by congruence, or right-life, involves…
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creative constraint

You might enjoy listening to this music while reading today’s post. Earlier this week, a group of us got together by video. We last saw each other a month ago, in person, at an annual gathering outside of Boston. Now back in our everyday lives, dotted across the US, Europe, and Australia, we regrouped to…